As reflected in the title of this blog, I am a lifetime Mormon. I find it surprisingly energizing to think about and mull over the doctrines and teachings of the church and the scriptures. My purpose here is to force myself to give structure and coherence to those thoughts. While in my mind, ideas and supposed insights float around and seem gloriously brilliant. I’ve noticed, though, that when I try to put them in writing, the once brilliant thought fades to a lesser light, or worse–a bland statement so obvious it goes without saying.
Putting things into a structure understandable to others and, even more so, releasing it for view by an audience (however, limited) forces me to work through and develop my free-flowing mental effusions into a structured, useable form. I am looking for greater discipline and accountability in my thinking by doing so.
However, I understand that not all thoughts or insights can or ought to be reduced to writing for open review and discussion. To a large extent, development of spiritual and religious understanding is an individual experience or, rather, a personal interaction between myself and the Spirit of God. The key scripture of faith and conversion in the Book of Mormon exhorts the reader to “ponder [the mercies of God] in your hearts” while reading and then to “ask God, the Eternal Father, in the name of Christ, if these things are not true. . . .” with no mention of discussing or debating the issue with others. Our ongoing development and education in matters pertaining to faith, God’s ways, and our spiritual awareness is to be pursued privately in the sacred places of our hearts, minds, and souls.
The Lord, through Joseph Smith, apparently after attempting to reveal how God orders and directs the universe, resorts to a parable and then the revelation breaks off with “. . . I leave these sayings with you to ponder in your hearts, with this commandment . . . that ye shall call upon me while I am near – Draw near unto me and I will draw near unto you; seek me diligently and ye shall find me; ask, and ye shall receive; knock, and it shall be opened unto you . . . .” (D&C 88:62-63). There is no directive or invitation to discuss or debate the issue in a gathering of church members. Rather, the members are to ponder and draw close to the Lord with the promise that the matter will eventually be opened to their understanding.
So, undertaking to write a blog presents me with an ongoing effort to balance the desire to discuss ideas with the private nature of interaction with God. Thus, if an idea or thought gets past the double hurdles of being a meaningful insight and not something better left for quiet reflection, it may get posted.
